Thomlin Jupp: A Foundling's Follies
A Comedy Fantasy Novel
What happens when Tom Jones meets absurdist fantasy in a world where dragons file tax returns and bureaucracy is the only universal constant? Find out in this satirical fantasy adventure that proves destiny has a sense of humor and a fondness for paperwork.
About the Book
Welcome to a world where the Department of Magical Affairs requires wizards to have proper licensing, where dragons must submit their hoarding activities for annual tax review, and where even the most epic of quests can be derailed by Form 27-B.
Thomlin Jupp: A Foundling's Follies is a comedic, satirical fantasy novel inspired by Henry Fielding's "Tom Jones." Set in a realm where bureaucracy reigns supreme and adventure requires proper documentation, this tale follows Thomlin Jupp, a foundling of uncertain parentage and even more uncertain judgment.
Written following the style of Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett, this story delivers witty dialogue, absurd situations, and plot twists that would make a pretzel jealous. Each chapter is a romp through a unique corner of the fantasy genre, featuring a cast of characters whose names may sound familiar, but whose species probably won't.
What to Expect:
- Characters whose names ring familiar bells, though you'll discover this Squire Westerton has considerably more scales
- Romance between individuals when at least one isn't entirely human
- Adventure that adheres to all safety regulations while being thoroughly inadvisable
- Humor that emerges when you add fantasy to the human condition and let it marinate in absurdity
- Philosophy disguised as footnotes, where all the best philosophy lives anyway
Meet the Characters
Thomlin Jupp
Our hero (with significant reservations about that term). A foundling of uncertain parentage who consistently chooses adventure over sensible apprenticeships.
Squire Worthalot
Thomlin's guardian, a genuinely good man whose existence proves the universe has a sense of irony. Maintains both integrity and sanity through elaborate filing systems.
Pembleton
Chief secretary and a goblin of impeccable credentials. Never without a clipboard, essential for both organization and intimidation.
Bridget Worthalot
The Squire's sister and formidable witch who prefers "chronologically experienced" and "enchantment-capable." Wears sensible gray robes.
Captain Blusterquill
A retired military low elf with strong opinions about proper queue formation and bureaucratic procedures.
Mrs. Pembleton
Head of Household Magical Maintenance and expert on infant-related situations, having raised seventeen goblin children.
Chapters
Follow Thomlin's journey through ten chapters of bureaucratic absurdity, romantic complications, and adventures that require proper documentation.
Introduction: In Which We Meet Our Hero (Sort Of)
A warning about what you're getting into, and why foundlings are never found somewhere sensible.
In Which a Discovery is Made, Forms are Filed, and Destiny Begins to Show an Alarming Interest in Proper Documentation
The morning that changed everything and required seventeen different permits.
In Which Education Proves More Dangerous Than Anticipated
Five years have passed since Thomlin's arrival at Paradise Hall, and his education has begun producing remarkable—and alarming—results. When Squire Worthalot attempts to enroll his ward in the prestigious Grimbledon Academy, the educational establishment encounters a student who questions why complicated methods are preferred over simple ones. Meanwhile, Paradise Hall has undergone "unexpected modifications" including a spontaneous library wing and an interdimensional postbox.
In Which a Person of Destiny Significance Discovers That Destiny Management Involves Considerably More Paperwork Than Expected
Coordinator Weatherby's official designation of Thomlin as a Person of Destiny Significance has attracted unwanted attention from various governmental departments. The domestic academy at Paradise Hall is producing remarkable results, leading to the arrival of two consulting educational experts: Professor Thwackmore (representing Traditional Academic Approach) and Master Quiddity (specializing in Progressive Educational Theory), whose philosophical differences threaten to complicate the carefully balanced educational environment.
Chapter 4: In Which Society Discovers Our Hero, Romance Begins to Show Alarming Signs of Probability
The household receives an invitation to the Westerton Estate's Spring Equinox Celebration, marking their entry into local society. This social gathering introduces Thomlin to wider society and the accomplished Sophia Westerton, widely acknowledged as the most accomplished young woman in the region. For Thomlin, who has never attended such a gathering, the celebration represents his introduction to social complexity that bears no resemblance to his education at Paradise Hall.
In Which Romance Proves to Require More Documentation Than Expected
The aftermath of Sophia's rescue from the garden maze creates unexpected social complications. While Sophia finds Thomlin's practical problem-solving approach refreshing, young Blifil recognizes a threat to his carefully planned courtship strategy. The household at Paradise Hall settles into "a routine of managed romantic tension" as competing romantic strategies emerge, with both administrative efficiency and genuine feelings complicating what should have been straightforward social interactions.
In Which Strategic Planning Encounters Unpredictable Variables
Summer intensifies both the heat and romantic tensions as incompatible courtship strategies collide. An invitation for Thomlin to stay at the Westerton estate to help with harvest celebration planning creates the perfect opportunity for romantic development—or disaster. When young Blifil volunteers to assist as well, the stage is set for concentrated romantic competition that social crisis management experts recommend avoiding whenever possible.
In Which Our Hero Discovers That Adventure Requires More Permits Than Expected
Thomlin makes the noble decision to leave Paradise Hall to avoid creating romantic complications, but discovers that departure planning is more complex than anticipated. What follows is perhaps the most thoroughly documented departure in Paradise Hall's history, complete with official notifications to the Department of Destiny Management, travel permits, and emergency contact protocols. Adventure, it turns out, requires considerably more paperwork than expected.
In Which Adventure Proves to Involve More Interpersonal Complications Than Expected
Thomlin's journey leads him into regions where moral complexity is more common and administrative solutions less available. He encounters Mrs. Molly Waters, a young widow struggling with cart repairs, child management, and impossible choices between independence with uncertainty or security with dependence. The situation provides exactly the sort of real-world ethical challenge that academic preparation cannot fully address.
In Which Destiny Management Encounters Budget Constraints, Ancient Mysteries Require Modern Documentation
Thomlin's travels bring him to the village of Westbridge, where a two-century-old jurisdictional dispute has created regulatory chaos. The village exists under the contradictory authority of three different governmental systems, requiring travelers to complete absurd paperwork certifying they are not supernatural entities or interdimensional spies. When Thomlin's accommodation forms trigger official attention, cosmic complications begin to intersect with bureaucratic realities in unexpected ways.
In Which Destiny Management Achieves Satisfactory Resolution
Six months of educational travel have transformed Thomlin into someone capable of balancing personal desires with royal responsibilities. His return to Paradise Hall is not a retreat but a purposeful transition to the next phase of his education. The household has been preparing comprehensively for his homecoming, and resolution is found to the romantic complications that originally made his departure necessary. Romance proves compatible with administrative efficiency when properly documented.
Sample Quotes
"If you're expecting a simple tale, you've clearly never met a goblin with a legal degree."— Chapter 2, probably
"The universe is not only queerer than we suppose, but queerer than we can suppose. It's also apparently run by someone with a very peculiar sense of humor and an alarming fondness for paperwork."— Ancient Wisdom, probably from a filing cabinet
"There are very few problems in this world that cannot be solved by the proper application of paperwork. Unfortunately, there are even fewer problems that should be solved that way."— The Administrative Philosophy of Squire Worthalot
"And thus begins a tale that proves, once and for all, that bureaucracy is indeed stranger than fiction. Mainly because fiction has to make sense."— Chapter 1, waiting in the wings with considerable trepidation